Tuesday, December 18, 2012

stop and stare

Every glance is killing meTime to make one last appealFor the life I lead

Stop and stareI think I’m moving but I go nowhereYeah, I know that everyone gets scaredBut I’ve become what I can’t be, oh
Stop and stare,You start to wonder why you're here not thereAnd you'd give anything to get what's fairBut fair ain't what you really needOh, can you see what I see?

all this while, I'm not exactly sure if I was living in the mist or do I know exactly what I want in my life....

I started to feel, that this life isn't the one I'm pursuing for..something is lacking...definitely

but what's it?

And I have yet to find it out myself....

Remember to stop and stare...and look back,if you have to....

Sunday, May 20, 2012

price and worth

price and worth of every single thing means differently to everyone....
something which is cheap and worthless to others may be very precious in your eyes...

for example, some people may collect a Hello Kitty toy worth $1000 as it is a limited edition...for someone who doesn't like toy/ Hello Kitty will get a shock looking at the price thinking that no one will ever get it, but at the same time, there could buyers who are willing to even pay $2000 for that so-called $1000 thingy...

a girl rushing for an important job interview may  buy a coat worth double than its usual price, but if it makes her looks confident in the interview and helps her to secure the dream job, it definitely worth it..isn't it?

sometimes, you may feel that a handmade birthday wish card is more precious than a channel bag...while at the same time,some people will prefer that channel bag rather than the card...(different preferences in terms of price and worth for everyone)

it doesn't apply to just material things...actions could apply the 'price and worth' theory too...

some people who have above average outer look went for cosmetic surgeries to look even better...
but they have to pay expensive surgery fees, bear the risk of failed surgery and the pain experienced by the physical body...

others start judging and commenting on it...

they may not understand the reasons behind it...does it worth all that? some people asked...

but most of the time, if the person thinks it's worth it, who are us to even question the price and worth of her/his decision?

an old lady who has retired from her job and supposed to enjoy her life, yet sometimes she chose to contribute the rest of the years taking care of her grandchildren although they are naughty, her children are willing to hire another baby sitter and she is weak due to old age..

sometimes, she just find it worthy to spend her time with the little ones...though she will have backache chasing after those little hybrid of angels (who are also devils)...

people sometimes could be stubborn, as they do not listen to others who advised it is not worthy for that price of a thing or an action

little that 'others' know, it is because they have a scale in their heart, who finds the things they buy or do, worthy of the price they have to pay...

sometimes, you know it is worthy, it carved a smile on your lips...

Shu Ying

Sunday, May 6, 2012

sometimes I love to pretend to be tomato.makeup

my eyes make up looks simple
but it wasn't...
not unless you are pro in make up..

here are what I did to my face..

1. apply UV block lotion SPF 30
2. facial make up base
3. foundation SPF 30
4. eye primer
5. eye brow coffee color pencil
6. bottom eye concealer
7.dark purple eye shadow
8.dark brown eye shadow 
9. black color pencil eye liner
10. black color liquid eye liner
11. eye lashes curler
12. black color mascara
13. fake eye lashes only at the outer corner of my eyes
14. second round of liquid eye liner
15. blusher
16. bronzer

and all these should be done within ..
10 minutes maximum..
steps I skipped: facial foundation power, bottom lashes, lipstick, highligher, etc

and I have fun last night enjoying Vietnamese food in my girl friend's birthday dinner with the girls ^^

and the next girls night out, I will be trying Tiffany's eye makeup in Twinkle's mtv...

and if you are wondering who is Tiffany and how awesome is her eye makeup
check this out!

me love red,

Tuesday, May 1, 2012


Theory = you know everything but nothing works
Practice = everything works but no one knows why
 Therefore, in life, we should combine both the theory and practice together
 and draw a conclusion...

nothing works and no one knows why!

Sometimes, in love and in life, we tend to take things for granted....just like what we can observe in a football match...

in the match,
everyone is chasing after the ball....

but one when got it, he kicks it...

although others are still chasing after it,

the person who got it, refuse to give others and continue to kick it...

life goes on,
shu ying

Wednesday, April 25, 2012


snapshots after makeup and before heading out to my housemate, Maggie's birthday...

 the front view of me smiling...
 looking to the left...
 this is really just random...
and here comes my part : FROWN

and we checked in Dave's Bistro Grill Bar

 sneaking into the background of the picture....and that was TIGER beer by the way
 not so sure of what drink is this....I was pouring my healthy DETOX tea in the background of the picture
 forever awkward look when people snap my picture...
 and they asked me to be relax and natural

we were tempted to try their popular dish on the menu...
but it costs RM80 for a quarter of a roasted piglet...



my friends told me I will have nasty body odour if I consume pork,mutton,beef, etc...

not sure if it is proven true

but I do not wanna smell bad..

lastly, the 'yam' look pic of mine...

 'yam' is perverted in one of the dialect of Chinese language...

yeah, indeed,I couldn't agree more to them I looked 'yam' in this pic...

Shu Ying

Sunday, April 22, 2012

high school.puppy love

puppy love is defined as ' The love between a young couple (in their teens I assumed) within a few weeks of getting together (never really lasted into marriages, but some puppy love lasted for years...) Not really true love, more blind affection - immature, young love. Tyically occurs before one person becomes a bitch' 

that definition wasn't from me

I googled,yeah and it's from Urban dictionary...

seems like the world does not have a good impression towards 'puppy love'..

however, I came to think about it differently...

I feel puppy love is a stage/experience of life where we should not miss out...

have you noticed,people in their teens, involving in love or so-called puppy love, the people around them would tell them that they are wasting their time, why? because this love isn't going to last and eventually you are going to get hurt! 

but, in my opinion, this is a stage where you are the most innocent and naive and true to love, as you don't judge much of the consequences and just follow how your heart feels...

as you grow up into your twenties and later in life, love isn't gonna be as simple as the puppy love in your teens anymore...but you still get to choose someone you truly love and wanna to spend the life with..

though you need to consider a lot...whether this love is going somewhere, I meant, marriages...

even sadly in thirties, where it's the time you should be 'married' and still not found the right one, I noticed people started getting desperate and just merely finding partners for the sake of marriages...

well, I just thought, some people missed the 'experience of being in simple and naive love' just because they never dated back in their teens...

never get a chance of to be really silly in love, willing to do anything and get hurt...

brief me,if I'm wrong about it...


Tuesday, April 17, 2012

abandoned house photoshoot

it was supposed to be on the main road in town,

where every now and then, cars passing by,

I got so freaked out,

couldn't be feeling more awkward...

giving up, they found it almost impossible to persuade me to just stand in the middle of the road and snap pictures..

decided to change the scene..

to abandoned houses...

and I found my last picture of the collection is quite interesting...

after all, it was my first time to pose and let others take my picture...

I hope I will do better in the next one..
which is next month..

time to hit the sack,
shu ying

Monday, April 16, 2012


Look at me
You may think you see
Who I really am
But you'll never know me
Every day
It's as if I play a part
Now I see
If I wear a mask
I can fool the world
But I cannot fool my heart

Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?

I am now
In a world where I
Have to hide my heart
And what I believe in
But somehow
I will show the world
What's inside my heart
And be loved for who I am

over the years, I learn more and more about myself
who I really am
and here are the compiled facts
feedback from people around me
and myself
which I myself find them true

1. I am a self-centered person (which means I do place myself first above everyone else)
2. I don't really care what happens around me
3. I care about how others look at me, how they judge me and their impression of me
4. I have low self confidence in some aspects
5. I don't check out guys, but I check out girls a lot, however, it doesn't make me a lesbian
6. I have no sense of direction
7. When I cry, my eyes resemble a little fountain
8. I take jokes too seriously, I take serious matter jokingly
9. I have little self control when it comes to shopping
10. When I am mad, I don't stay and fight, I walk away

there is no right or wrong when it comes to personality,
everyone is just different
in this world, each person will have people who love them
and also people who hates them
life's fair
and if anyone hates me for who I am,
I will tell myself
'I have a normal life'


Sunday, April 15, 2012

sometimes, the feelings just ain't right

ever realized that sometimes, everything seems to go the wrong way?

no matter how hard you've tried...you just feel life is pushing you too much?

and that you are asking too much from yourself?

wanting to do all the best in almost all the the aspects?

when you feel you're on the verge of breaking down?

I am,now in this condition, feeling stuck at my assignments, tests a

nd reports...

physically totally exhausted...

but I do not know how to pull myself into one piece once again..

maybe I do,tomorrow, when I woke up from my sleep...

sometimes, things just don't feel okay...

somehow, they will be okay in the end

just remember to convince yourself...

like how I do now...

shu ying

-I'll spread my wings and learn how to fly-

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Papa, can you hear me sing?

this is a movie produced in 1983, although it's a kinda old movie, although I was born so much later compared to the movie, I would like to say, this is the one of the best movies I have ever watched in my life.

It is a movie demonstrating how great a father's love can be, to his beloved daughter....i swear each time I watched,ever since i was 4 or 5 years old until recently, I watch the whole movie again part by part in youtube, i cried from part 1/9 to part 9/9 and it haunted me for 2 days, each time I flashback about the movie, my heart feels kinda sour...

here is the link to this movie, and I found english subtitles for those who don't understand Taiwanese's mandarin...

here is the short summary of the movie...

the main character, the father, is a deaf man who collects and sells old alcohol bottles, making enough living to barely feed himself and his wife...one fine morning, he passes by a thrash bin and he found a young baby crying in the thrash, her biological mother has abandoned her but named her 'Ah Mei'..

that man brought her home, not knowing that his wife will be upset about this matter.To her, their life has been considered poor enough to feed both of them and now,he brought back another child, someone else's child, and she knows it is not cheap to feed a child. Ah Mei's crying and the hard life they lead where the father needs to feed 3 persons with the little money he makes, the man's wife decided to leave him....

the man wanted to make her stay,but as the child cries, he turned back, he chose the child instead of his wife...his wife left him..and him,a man who cannot speak a word, decided to dedicate his life to raise her up and to love her whole-heartedly...unconditional love,i should say...

the child finally grow up...and she saved a German Shepherd who is injured..named it 'Lai Fu'...an obedient and loyal dog, a girl and her father, together this family was built...

years and years passed...the girl finally grew up into a fine lady, she got a job in a lounge bar where she works as a singer in that bar....little did she noticed, a young man, Shi Jun Mai, noticed her, he is a song composer and lyrics writer, he spotted her and thinks she is of rare talent...

they then got closer, he writes and composes songs for her to sing in the lounge bar, little did they realised, it changes her life completely when her rare talent in singing was spotted by the production company (I am not so sure what do people call those companies who sign artists)..

Ah Mei signed contract with the company, to be a singer, with the conditions where she needs to change her name to Sun Jui Chi and she needs to cheat about her family background to make her fans thinks that she comes from a wealthy and well-educated family....

in her celebration party after her successful concert in Taiwan, her father attended it without invitation because he misses her so much since she does not goes home for months now, she was forced by her manager not to admit that the old man in his rags is her father, and her father loves her so much that he showed to the media with his sign language that he is not her father but a fraud...and he left the party

life is even more unbearable when his dog, Lai Fu, died when trying to save him from a reckless motorcycle rider....

on the other hand, she then got famous real fast and moved to a bigger condominium prepared by the company,

and her distant with her boyfriend, Shi Jun Mai, who always be there with her, grows, he feels she has changed into someone he no longer know, no longer the innocent girl he met singing in the bar...he then left her...

she had her tour concert in Asia...at the same time, her father's health is getting worse...

Shi Jun Mai went to visit her father,and he wrote a soulful song for her,hoping that she would sing it in her Taiwan concert after her Asia tour..the song was about her father and her...

when she came back to Taiwan after her Asia tour,her manager stopped her from meeting her father of her tight schedule and upcoming concert..

that night, her father watches her concert through the television's screen, suddenly...his heart grows ill and he was immediately admitted to hospital...

unable to speak or move, his eyes showed that he is missing Ah Mei badly....his friend who sent him to hospital, rushed to the concert and had Ah Mei rushing to hospital to see him for one last chance...

unfortunately, she couldn't make it...he stopped breathing before he could see her...

the movie ended with Ah Mei singing the song Shi Jun Mai wrote for her, in the concert, dedicated to her father....

* I am too lazy to bother to either write in past tense or present tense anymore *

as long as anyone who reads this understand...


Saturday, April 7, 2012

the many faces of me

tonnes of assignments, lab reports, lecture classes and my part

time work

tight schedule all the time

and when I am looking almost a zombie...

WHAT? formal presentation on this coming Saturday???

what the ______!!! (fill in the blank)


but in this hectic lifestyle, I still like to snap my own portrait pictures...


no particular reasons, I just like to take pictures of myself


to see the changes in my hairstyle?

to see how I actually age over the years?

for fun? I personally like to edit pictures

that is what I can do in when I am tired of typing my reports but I have to continue to sit in front of my laptop?

so,these are few pictures I snapped...the many faces of me...

first picture, the Queen of Pride look:

hell yeah, my totally-excited look?

Oh no,trying-to-be-cute look.... =='''

the night is cool~~

EMOness spreading around me....

today-gonna-be-a good-day look!

grumpy look?

Arrogant look:

A smile a day, keep all troubles away =D

'dream, hope and love' look with my favourite quote of all time,

so, which look is the best for me?

gonna go,

till the next post,

with love,


Friday, March 23, 2012

i'm sexy and i know it

wow...the title above sounds so... arrogant..but anyway,it is good to boost up my confidence level sometimes...

as a preparation for myself?


upcoming photo shoot scheduled by one of my friends...

and i have been practicing the so-called sexy expressions recently...

and goodbye for now

for fun,


Thursday, March 15, 2012


I was born with a gift,the gift to paint and draw what my eyes see...

Friday, January 27, 2012

when a guy....

when a guy says:

If a guy told you 'it is not your fault,it is my problem...I'm just not a good one' when he is asking for a break up, he doesn't mean it that way....

what he was trying to say is....

'you are not good enough for me and I definitely want to dump you now..but I am being constantly loaded with guilt,is there anything I can do to make you feel better?'

and when he said that,be prepared,he is really leaving you...or...very likely to leave you...

another no-no word to be heard from a guy is ..... 'I'm TIRED of these arguments...'

the word 'tired' itself can mean a lot..but for sure,he is very likely to mean this:

'I am mentally exhausted to continue to fight with you over certain matters and I think you should stop it or I need to take a break from our relationship to review if it is worthy for us to be together/if there is any more future lay ahead of us'

when a guy does:

  • if a guy likes you so so only,he will only watch you from far but not telling you.
  • if a guy likes you enough, he will gather up all the courage to confess and perhaps asking you to be his significant someone.
  • if you rejected him and he sort of starts to avoid you and suddenly disappear from your world, actually he doesn't love you but himself. why? It's simple,because he doesn't wanna waste anymore time on you once he knew he stands no chance to get your nodding and he chose to free himself from the so-called heartbreaking feeling he feels by not seeing you anymore : out of sight,out of mind.
  • if you rejected him and he chose to be your friend (better friend than nothing), how about reconsider such a guy? despite the awkwardness and the pain he feels when he claims to love you so much and yet,you are not with him,he still chose to remain around you as your friend,it means he cares for you more than himself and cannot afford to lose you,even if you don't want to be with him,treasure such a friend =)
cherish a person when he/she is there for you, no matter how busy you are, because when one's heart has given up, turned cold and walked away, it is already too late for anything to be done...as things will not be the same anymore...

as I am typing this blog post,I am actually listening to Taylor Swift's Back to December..beautiful song telling how much she regretted for taking him for granted...

I'm so glad you made time to see me.
How's life? Tell me how's your family.
I haven't seen them in a while.
You've been good, busier than ever,
We small talk, work and the weather,
Your guard is up and I know why.
Because the last time you saw me
Is still burned in the back of your mind.
You gave me roses and I left them there to die.

So this is me swallowing my pride,
Standing in front of you saying, "I'm sorry for that night,"
And I go back to December all the time.
It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you.
Wishing I'd realized what I had when you were mine.
I'd go back to December, turn around and make it all right.
I go back to December all the time.

Valentine is around the corner now....wishing whoever who read this post to have a really meaningful moment on February the 14th

shu ying